"She doesn't properly adjust, or use, or persist with, her hearing aid"
Has this ever irritated you?
If you have you ever made or felt like making this sort of remark about a deaf person, it would probably help for you to understand what lies behind it.
Digital hearing aids can be wonderful if (a) they are properly set up (which may take a number of return visits to the suppliers) and (b) the hearing problem is suitable for hearing aids, which is by no means always the case. Then to be optimally effective, there need to be hearing aids in both ears to pinpoint the direction and position of a sound. Otherwise background noise is a major problem.
How to tackle the problem
If the deaf person really can't get on with hearing aids, for whatever reason, the only way forward is for everyone concerned to make the best of things. There several pages on coping with hearing aid problems. Click here for the first page and its links to the other pages. Before accepting that nothing can be done, it will be worth studying them.
Here are some of the reasons I have heard for not getting on with hearing aids:
I need a hearing aid most in social situations where people are eating together, but the hearing aid just amplifies my own crunching, so I still can't understand what is being said.
My hearing aid seems to amplify my tinnitus more than what people are saying.
Only one of my ears is suitable for a hearing aid, so even when wearing it, I can't distinguish one conversation from another in background noise.
My pain threshold is too close to the level of amplification necessary to hear speech clearly.
Perhaps some of these reasons are valid for the person who doesn't wear the hearing aid. It would probably help to explore her reasons with her.
Common irritations with deaf people and what to do about them
Disclaimer: The information on this site is for a lay audience and I cannot be responsible for errors or omissions. The views, strategies, advice and suggestions etc are based on my personal experience and are not necessarily appropriate for anyone else. They should, hopefully, stimulate individuals to develop their own strategies.